Holding Jesus Hostage

A couple in Oakfield Township are devastated over the fact that someone has stolen their statue of Jesus from their front yard.

The family regularly walks their dachshunds, and in the past, has not cleaned up after they’ve done number 2.  After receiving complaints from neighbors, they have started picking up afterwards.  But the person who stole Jesus says they are still leaving landmines in the yards of their neighbors, according to a ransom note left in their mailbox:

“We are holding Jesus ransom until you clean up the poopie from your wieners and trust us we see you take your wieners for long walks w/out picking up their poopie in our yards. This has upset us dearly so please clean up all the weiner poopie, if you want to see Jesus unharmed. Sincerely, Lindy Lane Residents.”

For the full story and video of the note (which is written in very childish handwriting) see WZZM.

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